Memorial website in the memory of your loved one
Tributes and Condolences
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Sorry for your loss,  / Angela Allen Mother Of Jonathan Allen (Passer By! )
I came upon your son,s site & I want you to know how very sorry I am for your loss as a mother who lost my 18 year old son, I do
understand your pain Please find comfort in knowing that God has your son and even though I still find myself questioning Why? this happened I have to hold on to the fact that God only takes the best!
I'm sure that your son & my Son are up there together joking around I'm sure that my husband and father will keep them company along with alot of others, I hope these words has brought you some comfort because sometimes even though we all have lost on these sites and try to offer comfort to others, there are still just know right words to say to those whom is grieveing. God Bless you and your family your will remain in my prayers.


Sinerely: Angela  if you would like to visit my family's sites I would be honored:

JONATHAN ALLEN--my1sonjra.memory-of.com {MY SON}
RONALD ALLEN--my1loverka.memory-of.com {MY HUSBAND}
RODNEY HULL--rodney-dale-hull.memory-of.com {MY FATHER}
I'm Sorry  / Roseann Mom To ^j^ Luis Vila Jr. (passer by )
I know how you feel for I lost my son too. to the same deadly disease Meningitus. Today makes 6 months he is gone but, never forgotten. I am sure Jacob is up in Heaven with my son and I believe they are looking down on us telling us not to be sad , not to cry for they are in the grace of our Lord. They are not suffering no more. My thoughts and prayers are with Jacob and his family. May God Bless.
Time is so short  / Heather &. Jeremy Larson-Frederick (friends)

We barely got to know you, but we liked you.  We had a lot of fun that night at the Bleeding Through show didn't we?  Wherever you are, I hope you are happy.  Your memory lives on...in all of us. 

Baby King  / Jason Landi (Student)
I almost smiled today
When I thought of something you said the last time I felt this way
I almost cried today
But the tears just wouldn't come, too much blocked up inside of me
How did I know you anyway?
A lucky draw, a twist of fate 
A candle in the window burning
And in my heart I know you're free
But it's so very hard to see
A page if ever was one turning

You made me laugh a thousand times 
You convinced me once or twice that I'd lost my mind
How do I, how do we, will we ever...
I thought about the things that you'd done today
And it made a little of the pain go away
I will remember forverer

I tried to beg you back
But when I got up to come find you I could feel my legs collapse
My reserves start to crack
But I promise when I shore them I will think of you and laugh
Why were you so damn far away?
I think of you now when I pray 
A candle in the window burning
And in my heart I know you're there
Putting addendems on my prayers
A page if ever was one turning

You made me laugh a thousand times
You convinced me once or twice that I'd lost my mind
How do I, how do we, will we ever...
I thought about the things that you'd done today
And it made a little of the pain go away
I will remember forverer
Just Don't Happen Twice - about losing KayAnn & Jake  / Randy Jessen (classmate, teammate )

Have you ever lost someone close to you?  Of course you have; everyone has.  I have lost many close people to me, one being a grandparent that remembered sitting on her dad's lap of the newest invention, a car, and an uncle that earned a Purple Heart serving his country in World War II, who remembered where he was when he heard two of our country's greatest leaders, John F. Kennedy, and Martin Luther King Jr., were assassinated.  However, when people like that leave, everyone smiles and laughs after a short tear to look back on a life well-lived.  They were elderly, had soft frail skin, and had lived every day to its fullest.  But being 18 years old is preparing for the big Homecoming game that all the past alumni would attend, getting all dolled up for prom so Mom can take all the flash blinding pictures, or finnally getting ready to toss your cap in the air to start one last summer with your friends before saying goodbye, full of fishing, shooting the bucket, and having a couple of bon fires.  However, saying goodbye to friends leaving for college is the way it should be; not putting two classmates, beloved friends, into the ground.

I remember both phone calls just like it was yesterday.  One, I was at a friend's house getting ready for after-prom activities when I received a phone call from a friend where I heard, "There has been an accident."  The other call was on a snowy day; we thought school had been canceled due to the snow, only to find out, "Something horrible has happened again."  Again?  I just knew what it had to be, my heart left me just as it did before, and I felt that same empty feeling while asking myself, "Why? What did we do?"  Those are some questions that I won't understand until the day I'm gone.  It was a feeling like I'd been hit by a truck, and I didn't want to do anything but cry and mourn with friends.  School wasn't the same either, having to meet in the gym to hear the same story over again about what had happened, where, and when arrangements would be.  Then, getting split up with different psychologists, AEA members, and pastors from around the area to explain the five grieving steps we would be feeling.  They also wanted us to release our inner thoughts; as you can guess, no one really wanted to.  Seeing all of the bouquets of flowers sent from all the surrounding schools, let us know we were in their prayers.  Having to try to continue with a regular day of school and activities when all everyone could think about was them.

Then came the wake, where a group of classmates all decided to attend together.  Having to wait outside in the cold windy weather because there was no room for us yet, but realizing how loved our friends truly were.  After  a short wait, we entered to sign our names in the guestbook, look at the pictures, watch the movie made, as it took our minds back to all the great memories we shared.  Trying to stay strong as we slowly approached the coffin as the minutes seemed like seconds, not wanting it to be the last time we would see our friends, even though we knew it would be.  Then it was time to slowly move out to allow others to pay their last respects.  We all left just as we entered, but now with tearful eyes, and broken hearts.

The next day was the day we had been dreading all week, the funeral, our last chance for one final goodbye.  We decided to attend the funeral as a class by taking a school bus, and sit in the front of the gym and church opposite of the families.  Both funerals were very sad as expected, however, both pastors had sermons that taught us to not be sad, but to be happy because they beat us in the ultimate race to heaven, and their lives were only meant to be that long according to God's plan.  As the service came to its conclusion we all exited together to load our quiet, lonely bus to follow the procession to the cemetery.  On the way we had police cars and fire trucks stopping the flow of traffic for us to get through.  Along the sides of the road, we saw every area news crew snapping a clip for the nightly news or their weekly papers.  We arrived at the cemetery to place our classmates at their final resting place; everyone was very cold and emotionally drained.  We all huddled together to listen and bow our heads for the final prayers, and release a balloon of their favorite colors into the sky to let them be free.  For it was time to let them be at peace, for us to heal together, and begin a new chapter of our lives.

No teenager should have to experience tragedies like these, but it has made me cherish every second of every day of my life, and realize how fast it can all be taken away.  KayAnn J. Kruckenberg left us April 28, 2005 from trauma to her head after a prom accident, and Jacob Wayne Dreier left us on March 13, 2006 after a sudden bout with meningitus.  These two will never be forgotten by the community or Class of 2006 at Aurelia High School for they were a sister and a brother who brought us many memories that will stick with us for a lifetime.
Sorry for your loss  / Lisa Taquino (Another Grieving Mom )
I am so sorry for the loss of your wonderful son, Jake.  I can tell he was an amazing young man and loved by many.  Right now I know you feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders.  Allow yourself to grieve for as long as you need.  It is not easy and will last for a long time.  I am told by many the grieve will never go away, we just learn how to manage and live with it. It has been 6 months since we loss our Laci to an AVM (brain bleed) and although we are functioning, the pain is still very fresh.  I pray God  has our children by his side and they are the happiest they have ever been in life.  Please know Jake and your family on in my thoughts and prayers. 
RIP, Jake.  / Daniel Marsh (Friend)
I never actually met Jake in person, but I wish I had. Jake was the kind of person who made you feel like you were his best friend since you were kids - just from talking to you on MSN. He used to make me laugh so much, his jokes and seemingly random sense of humor, and positive charisma he always had about him. But now he's making others laugh up in heaven, and I miss him.
Jake / Lauren (Friend)
I met Jake on the internet a year or so ago, and I feel so privelidged to have gotten to know him, he was such an amazing person, treated everyone so well...It's amazing how much of an impact he made on my life without me even meeting him.. He always managed to put a smile on my face every time i talked to him, and his stories always cracked me up :)  I used to come home from school waiting for him to come online. As soon as his screen name popped up on my computer screen a huge smile took over my face..
I can't imagine what you're going through, but you raised one hell of a son :)
Poop woosers forever Jake! I love you budxxxxx
Poetry to lost friends  / Matt Bodholdt (Friend)
Not a day goes by where I don't think of Jake in some way.  Missing you tremendously every day...
 

Fire

Continuance of breath?
Lives slide by
just beyond our horizon
what comtemplates these atrocities?
why the sphere still reels (is beyond me)
when the birds stopped that day
five seconds became infinite
no words can encompass
no action can convalesce.
the moment
burns
the fire inside inspires being
(paradox)
alive
for those who care
alive
for those who are no longer there

seconds pass by
one by one
each fleeting moment
a chance to change...


Fragility

mossy rock cushion,
beautiful and treacherous,
doesn't bequeath traction.
it beckons
Come on, they say, come in
the air is fine
crisp on this bittersweet day
of relief transcending pain…
but even one step is a perilous journey
for the rest of us…

I can't help but wonder
what it was like to let go.
where is the mind,
when freedom becomes reality?
there's something to see now.
new life in death?
the suffering at the end of it's presence.
no more pain, no more angst

you would tell me not to shed a tear,
I still can't hear you…

Somehow this is where we all end
inevitable of life, obliging death
we shall meet again
if only for a brief second
our paths will cross

My friend  / Joseph Whalen (Friend)
I knew Jake for about a year, he and his brother Luke and I met on the internet and remained close friends despite the distance. There wouldn't be a day that passed by where Jake didn't find a way to make me laugh. Luke has helped me through a lot of hard times in my life, and Jake just helped me smile when stupid things were getting me down. He was seriously the funniest kid ever, coming up with the most random things to say all the time. He was meant to be around people, just so he could make them laugh and enjoy everyone's different personalities. I really valued the time I had, talking to Jake, and I hope wherever he is, he's chilling out with Brother Dime and having a good ol' time.

Joe Whalen
angel artists  / Miv London (another grieving mom )
Laurie,
Thank you for the lovely tribute on Sara's site. Jacob had the soul of an artist, and I'm sure he and Sara would have had much in common. Sara was about to start college and major in art.  I envision the two of them together painting glorious pictures in heaven.
I send you blessings for peace and comfort as we walk this painful path of loss and healing.
Love,
Miv
The Embrace  / Poem By Luke Dreier (Jake's brother )



The Embrace
by Luke Dreier

Looking out across barren fields
This is a battle fought without swords and shields
Though I would like to find a way
To protect myself from the memory of that day.

Come back,
Come back home again.

I live in denial of all that is lost now,
Coming to grips with sadness somehow.
How could all that I trusted in -
be ripped away?

Can you see?
Can you see this pain that is plaguing me?

On earth a man but for a few days,
Living now where only sunlight 
                                              casts down its beautiful rays.
A year of thought, or lack thereof, 
                                                 and still no reasons why.
A year and my god has it flown by.

Can you hear?
Can you hear the sound of my weary heart?

Long have I tried in vain
To clear my head of this pouring rain.
Some days it seems that everythig is lost
And there is nothing to gain.

Can you feel?
My arms empty of your embrace?

I must somehow keep moving on,
Steps forward even though you are gone.
I celebrate you and I will forever long.
Never will I stop singing your song.

Do you know?
Do you know how proud of you I still am?

In your honor I live, laugh, and love,
Because somewhere on wings 
                                            you are soaring like the dove.
Reaching for your embrace,
Wishing you were here and knowing such is not the case.

Did you know?
Did you know that you left 
                       before I could tell you how much I love you?

You can hear me all the time now in these dark days.
I know now, you are with me in so many ways.
If it's one thing I ask of so many things I lack,
Please make the brighter days come back.

This is my longing embrace.
This is my wish to once again see your face.

These are the questions with no answers.

Yet I know . . .
Yet I know . . . we had and still have a love unbroken.
You are everything to me.
Yet I still fail to see, why my embrace is still so empty . . .

Prose Piece  / Miranda Galvin (fellow aurelian )
The following is an excerpt from my prose piece for college speech.  The 10 min. piece covers an eleven month span.

Green and black are now the colors of my soul. Two bracelets, side by side on my wrist. They look and feel like they have been there all along, maybe because the people we remember have never left our hearts. I am still amazed that I see a lone green bracelet or a duo on the wrists of many girls as they get dressed up in their finest this spring. Off to formal or prom we go with an accessory some may frown on. But instead I understand why they are part of the night. Because Kayann and Jake will never leave our hearts. It reminds us to enjoy life, and allows them to come along for the ride to an event they will never have the chance to experience. Sr. Prom, College Formal... Today was Red and Black Day at school, this got me thinking back to Kayann's fav. outfit day last year. Green choral reading shirt, grey sweat pants - inside out and cut into capris, and tennis shoes.
^
So I was listening to the priest talk today
On this St. Pattys day
and what he said hit me
really hard.
Because what he had to say was so perfect for my life.
It had to do with how yes we could save ourselves the pain.
But that would mean missing out on the relationship.
And its not human instincts to just steer away from forming friendships.

So when I think about why I won’t give up
when I know pain will come in the end.
I know that I am right
to say that I would rather hurt horribly,
but have had enjoyed every moment of the travels
than to not hurt at all.

I am ready to hold people up
when the day comes
if needed
like you did for me
over and over again.
Than just bow out gracefully now.
You ask me if I’m scared,
yes, at times I’m petrified,
but I know with the help
of a certain someone
all things will be ok.

So, I guess last week
when I had a "breaking moment"
I was not crazy.
The Lord was just showing me the way.
Because here I sit tonight
as prepared has I ever have to hit the ground running.
With my mission for life,
it’s a simple thing
and you may not understand
at the time
but...
Live each day to the fullest
as if it is your last
because you never know
when the end may come.
Give hugs and say the three simple words
I love you
as often as possible.
As you never know when you may turn around
and have someone close to you gone.
Just like that.

I am getting good at this funeral thing
and I don’t like it,
But I am using what the Lord has given me
to not let someone hurt like we all have.
So maybe, when the time comes
I will have enjoyed the moments
and will be able to let a friend go.
Go with the Lord, to a peaceful place
free of pain and suffering.
^
(Life goes on. The calendar still flips to a new day, no matter if you are ready or not. Weeks come and go. Month of may graduation)

To those of you who understand.
There are 37 of you
37 close friends
getting ready to go your seperate ways.
There is a whole town full of you.
A town watching us all grow up and leave.

We all have our own ways
ways of dealing with it.
We all have our own memories.
Mine includes two great cheerleading seasons
filled with smiles, laughs, and funny stories.
Mine also includes my Sr. year Homecoming
during the boys' volleyball game.

Graduation is usually seen as a happy time
with tears of happyness lightly cried.
But today is not your typical graduation.
But you know what
after remembering,
laughing, and crying
it is your time to go out and make a difference in the world.
Fly free of the small town that has raised you.
Hold on to the memories
and take Kayann and Jake
on the ride of life with you.
Because I can tell you
from experience
when no one else gets it,
because its an "Aurelia thing",
they will be laughing with you.

I know it hurts,
trust me
my heart burns.
But
someday soon
you will be able to think of those two
and just smile.

I know
because I do.
When I see the Sigs
just being the Sigs.
Or other college guys
just being boys.
I smile
and think how much Jake
would have enjoyed
the best four years of his life.

I know
when
I watch a friend
be carefree
and silly.
I smile
knowing
that when I close my eyes
I can see Kayann.

It could be a skate boarder on campus
the color green
or simpling someone
living each day to the fullest.
I am reminded that those two are
in a better place
the place we are all
preparing to be
during this short visit on earth.

God Bless you
Angels
Blaine's Poem for KayAnn & Jake  / about Jake's class
Jake's class had lost a classmate eleven months before his death.  A parent, Blaine Perry, wrote this poem after Jake's death.  We will never be able to thank Blaine enough for how much this poem means to us and how much comfort it brings us to think about Jake and his friend, KayAnn, two saints in heaven now, watching over us!
                                          Thank you, Blaine!



Class of 2006

A small town in Iowa
Their graduation is at hand,
But for this small class, 
Instead of joy, heartache is the plan.
They lost one of their own 
              in April of last year,
An accident scarred their prom,
A loss of one so dear.
It's March now, a short year of healing,
But for this small class, 
                  another loss this season.
He sat in class on Friday, 
                  an empty chair by Monday,
A short illness, the only reason.
I've known this class a long time.
They have been my kid's friends.
I've watched them grow for many years,
Ball games and concerts, 
       too many to mention.
I did not want to intrude,
Not wanting to cramp their style,
So, "Good game, Jake," 
             Nice concert,"KayAnn,"
Was about all I'd have to say.
A great joy amongst this sorrow
To this class of Aurelia High
For they really knew these souls
As only classmates can.
You see, the real loss is mine.
I've let too many chances slip by
To really get to know them.
I was watching from the sidelines.
Now God has these two saints,
They stand by His side.
I'm left down here, but not alone.
For He's given me more saints to know.

thoughts from Mom  / yearbook dedication (& poem )

Our son, Jacob, was about two months from his high school graduation in May of 2006 when he died in March, five days after his 18th birthday.  The parents of the graduates are asked to submit a dedication for the yearbook several months before graduation.  This is what I had written and submitted.  It speaks of our dreams for his future.

Jake, you've grown up into a young man with potential for great success.  We are so proud of you and all you've accomplished.  You have always been your own person, pursuing your own interests with fervor.  God has given you a wide variety of talents!  Combine these with your great personality to find true joy and make a difference in the world.  Keep the faith, follow your dreams, and always know how much we love you.  -- Mom and Dad

Whenever I find myself confused about why God made Jake this wonderful way and then didn't save his life here on earth to go on and fulfill all this, I have to remind myself that Jake has indeed found true joy and his ultimate success by having eternal life with God.

Jake's smile and laugh, his big, strong body and powerful physical skills, his creative enthusiasm and energy, his wonderful art and sense of humor, his love and steadfast loyalty to his friends and family, will ever be in my mind and heart and soul.  God blessed us so greatly by giving us Jake.  He is still a wonderous and awesome creation of God!  I know he is with all who love him, always, and in a more mysterious way - beyond our human understanding, will accomplish even more fantastic things.

I can't sum it up and say it any better than in this poem given to us by his classmates:


                          My Child

You are the poem I dreamed of writing,
The masterpiece I dreamed to paint . . .
You are the shining star I reached for
    in my ever hopeful quest for life fulfilled.
You are my child . . .
Now, with all things, I am blessed.

So sorry for your loss  / Renee Grinolds (Jamie Dawns Mom)   Read >>
So sorry for your loss  / Renee Grinolds (Jamie Dawns Mom)
I'm so sorry for the loss of your wonderful Jacob. There are so many whys in this world and the good news is that someday we will know the answers and will be rewarded for all the suffering done here on earth. My Jamie was killed in a car accident on 12-23-05. She too was in 4-H and did very well - she was happiest if she could beat her sisters:) She was also in FFA and sports. There are so many things I miss about her and running to her activities but in my mind she's still doing everything that she loved, just on a higher level. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I wish you peace on this Valentines day. Close
Our sons  / Marsha Christian (mother of angel Derrick Rowe )  Read >>
Our sons  / Marsha Christian (mother of angel Derrick Rowe )
Our sons are really having a ball up in Heaven, I am sure.  Comparing 4-H, FFA, skateboarding, art, woodworking, etc...My Derrick was a very friendly person and I can tell Jake was too.  Please know that I feel your pain and am here if you ever need me. I am not good with words, but I will help you any way I can.  God bless you.
Marsha Christian
www.derrickrowe-memory-of.com


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